Victoria Tornegren
sugarinspo
alright my beautiful sugar babies and lovely ladies looking into entering the sugar bowl, i have been getting a huge amount of messages asking me all sorts of questions, so i decided to write this tell-all post on how to master the art of sugaring.
before you read on, just know that i do and always have had sex with my sds. if you are afraid of sleeping with older men, sugaring is not for you. 99.99% of the time, men will want to have a sexual relationship with you. personally, i have never met a man that has wanted a platonic relationship. don’t waste your time, if you cannot fathom the thought of having sex with a sugar daddy, being a sugar baby is out of the question.
i started looking for a sugar daddy on my 18th birthday. i created a profile on seekingarrangement.com and three days later, i found my perfect sd. at the time, i was in the midwest so the average per meet allowance was $300 but my sd and i agreed upon a $500 per meet allowance. if you want to read more about all of my sds, click here.
he was everything i wanted, a millionaire living in a huge mansion in the wealthiest city in my area, super attractive for his age, and also the biggest sweetheart in the world. he and i had the same ideas about what an arrangement should be like. we had day parties that turned into sleepovers, i invited my friends who all were interested in being a sb and were down to play with him and his friends, he provided an amazing house and of course, lots of cash for me and all of my friends. he and i had and still have an amazing friendship. we have each others backs on anything.
seeing that i had to move to los angeles for college, i started looking for a sd in la right away. i wrote up a new bio and changed my location so that los angeles daddies could see me. i did this about 10 days prior to moving so that i could start going on dates right away.
after arriving in la, i was living off of the money that i had saved and found a couple of ok daddies that i could see every so often for extra cash, but not anything amazing right off of the bat. after sticking with one for 3 months, i saw that even the $8k/month allowance he was giving me wasn’t worth it. after seeing his reaction to me crying, i could tell that he really didn’t care about me at all, and that i was literally only a fuck toy to him. we broke it off after that and i started searching on sa again. after going on way too many dates and not making enough money, i became an escort and worked under a madame. the money seemed amazing, $1k/hour with a 2 hour minimum (before the 30% cut that my madame took) but after seeing 4 clients i decided that i couldn’t do it anymore. i began searching again and refused to settle for anything less than perfect.
i ended up meeting my dream whale daddy. handsome, caring, and mega fucking rich, i couldn’t ask for anyone better. we ended up hitting it off the first night we met and agreed upon a $2k/meet arrangement until we trusted each other enough to start something monthly. i am currently with him, and life couldn’t get any better.
so how can you score the perfect sd, and how do you keep him interested? read on to find out.
1) know what you want from sugaring. i wrote down a list of all of the material things that i wanted from an arrangement, and all of the personality traits that i wanted in my sugar daddy. i decided on my desired allowance and what type of time i wanted to be spending with my sd. personally, i was looking for a sugar daddy that doubled as a friend. someone that i genuinely enjoy spending my time with. i am the type of sugar baby that wants to have sleepovers, spend cozy nights in on occasion, and meet my sds friends. i knew that i wanted my sd to drive a luxury sports car, live in a mansion, and have a huge amount of expendable income. there are a lot of “sugar daddys” out there that drive a moderately priced car, live in an average sized house, and make enough money to give a girl $4k a month and not break the bank. are they worth your time? maybe. honestly, sometimes you need to focus on getting that money before you can find someone that will take you on a last minute trip to ibiza. if sugaring is your only income, your best bet might be finding 3 men that want to see you 2-4 times per month for $4k/month each. but if you are sugaring to live in luxury, there is no point in settling just because the cash is good. personally i don’t feel okay with having multiple sugar daddies, i think that when you find your perfect sd you won’t need anything more than what he can provide for you. i have never had multiple steady arrangements going on at the same time, but i understand that its a better option for some girls. whatever your situation is, come up with a list of needs and wants, and be determined to find a sugar daddy that fulfills them.
2) make the “perfect profile” on seekingarrangement.com. i had one and it is a huge reason why i found who i found. by that i mean i had a clear, close up selfie with a smile on my face as my profile picture. the lighting was perfect, i took the picture while i was facing a window with lots of light (around 3pm) so it made my eyes pop, my teeth look white, and my skin look smooth. i had 2 other public pictures, one mirror pic that i took in a crop top and shorts in good lighting, and another selfie of me not smiling. in all of these photos i was wearing a full face of makeup, but instead of wearing eyeshadow i only wore black winged eyeliner and mascara, and instead of lipstick i wore chapstick with a hint of shine. i got a ton of messages complimenting me on my “natural beauty” (men are fucking clueless when it comes to makeup). for my private pics i had 5 full body pictures that i was wearing tight clothing in, it is crucial to have pictures that show your silhouette, this holds true for any body type! don’t edit (unless you have experience in doing light amounts of retouching) your photos, don’t hide your body in baggy clothes, and please for the love of god do not exclude a body picture from your profile. potential sds want to see exactly what you look like before they meet you so that they know what to expect before making plans to meet. and having a good amount of pictures on your profile makes the dreaded “send me more pics” question obsolete. i did have 2 other pics (one in a bikini and one in a sports bra) for men who i was really interested in, and a couple nude pics that i would send to pots that were willing to pay $20/pic with a 5 pic minimum.
but wait! your profile isn’t all about your pictures, to complete your perfect profile and have your inbox flooding with millionaires in no time, you must write out an amazing bio and explain exactly what you want under the “what i’m looking for” section. when i first wrote my profile it was a bit vague and typical, but after going through my first arrangement, i developed a persona. my persona is adriana, the barely legal 18 yr old girl with a genuine personality and a slammin’ body. adriana is a submissive princess that loves to call her man “daddy” and gets everything she ever wants. i realized that having this persona really made being a sb fun, and men liked it too. so i wrote my bio to match adriana’s personality, stating that “i need a man that needs to love to be called ‘daddy’” and that “i’m not attracted to men under 40″ (ladies, older men loved that i wrote that, they’re the ones with the true money, and there are way too many girls that state that they aren’t interested in anyone over 40). my bio and “what i’m looking for” section was written with good grammar and didn’t have typos, which also helped. i strongly recommend coming up with an alter ego and deciding to be her when you are sugaring. are you a vixen dom that will spice up a married mans private life? are you a sweet little girl next door that just wants to be taken care of? whatever you decide, make it shine through in your profile and remember that you can never be too specific. guys love reading about exactly what you want, and then you will have men sending you specific messages about how they can take care of your needs. i.e. “i’m done with school and i love to travel, so i’m looking for a daddy with a private jet” you may get messages saying “so you said you like men with jets? i have 3.” viola! now you have someone that is attracted to you and has what you want! perfect.
3) understand what men want, and learn how to find out what his specific desires are the first time you meet him. the guys that i would meet up with knew what i was looking for, and in general they knew what my personality was like. when i met with them in person, i really played up the part of my persona that they loved. with some men, they were in love with the fact that i was 18. other men loved that i was outgoing and not afraid to show my true colors at first. whatever they loved, i played it up. and anything they weren’t interested in, i tried to not bring it up without seeming fake. learning how to read a guy right off the bat takes a little bit of time but should be generally the same for most men that you find interest in. learning what they truly want is also a huge part of keeping them satisfied in bed. don’t be afraid to say naughty things, watch porn to get some ideas of what to say (and what not to say) if you are really clueless like i was. for me, i watched a lot of porn under the “teen” category on pornhub and listened to what the girls said and did, then i put my own twist on it whilst in bed with my sd. since my sd loved the fact that i was so young, screaming out “yes daddy, fuck my eighteen year old pussy harder!” made him cum in .025 seconds. don’t be afraid to talk dirty and always remember, it is your job to be their perfect fantasy.
4) dress for success. when meeting pots, i tried to stick to an outfit that wasn’t showing too much skin, but yet showed my silhouette. think tight jeans and a fitting shirt with a high neckline. i have found that men like it more when i wear lighter colors, rather than when i wear all black. whatever your body type may be, try to accentuate your best feature. have big boobs? wear a low cut dress that will show off your bust. have a great ass? leggings and cute tank top will have men drooling all over you. plus size? don’t be afraid to show off your curves in a cute romper with wedges. small bust? try a body suit with high rise jeans. tumblr is filled to the brim with cute outfit inspo with dupes that wont break the bank. i see a lot of posts from sugar accounts saying “great outfit to meet a pot: cute gucci dress with some red bottoms and a chanel clutch!!!” like what??? how tf do you expect every girl to wear a $10,000 outfit. yes, it is good to have a few designer pieces, but its not essential to wear designer 24/7. especially if you are brand new to the sugar bowl. i would assume that most men can’t tell the difference between zara and diane von fuerstenburg, and if they can, ask them to take you shopping. if anyone should be funding your wardrobe, it should be your sd.
5) take care of yourself. it’s your job to look your best at all times. a girl that looks worn out is the last thing a sd is looking for. so please: learn how to apply makeup properly (youtube tutorials are great), shower everyday, wax, shave, style your hair, whiten your teeth (groupon always has deals for pro whitening for $100-200), moisturize, use a perfume (less is more), use ph wipes for your coochie, eat healthy, exercise, paint your nails (nude tones or subtle french tip always are a good choice), wear a bra that really fits and matching underwear to go along, wear jewelry (at least cute stud earrings), have good posture, and always remember to smile.
6) be positive. nobody enjoys being around a sad person, especially not if they’re paying for it. a positive attitude not only attracts men, it makes them want to stay. remember that an arrangement is not as emotionally involved as a real relationship. always smile, always be polite, always look on the bright side. keep it light and fun. feed their ego, tell them that they’re the best you’ve ever had. after all, how can you get sick of a sexy ass woman thats always happy to be there?
7) set goals, and tell them about it. whether you are trying to travel the world, graduate from college debt free, or own your own business, let sds know. men love to hear that you have dreams and goals, it gives them even more of a reason to fund you. even if you don’t agree on an arrangement with a pot, having a reason to why you sugar might inspire them to connect you with people in their circle that can help you achieve your goals.
8) practice your conversation skills. have topics and questions that you can bring up when the conversation gets old. keeping up on the news is a good way to talk about things that most businessmen find interest in. ask your sd questions, especially where you are asking their opinion, it makes them feel important. i try not to get into deep topics with my sd until i know that they have similar views as i do, conflicting views about meaningful subjects can ruin a relationship. when speaking, try not to slur your words and try to use correct grammar. i still swear around my sd, but i try to keep it to a minimum because i know some men find it tacky. at least try to cut it out where its unnecessary i.e., saying “fucking shit i cant find my fucking sock fuck my life” when you could say “i cant seem to find my sock”
9) be adventurous. and by this, i don’t mean try anal. a lot of men find an escape in having a sugar baby, your’e young, wild, and free. if he says he wants to go a few states over for the weekend, say yes. you haven’t tried sashimi yet? go to sushi bar and split 9 plates of it with him. he loves to go skiing? ask him to buy you lessons. he wants to bring another girl into the bedroom? give it a try. whatever it is, sugar daddys are tired of the “ew, no” or “omg i’m too scared!” type of women. generally, sds don’t find a stubborn attitude cute.
10) control the bitch in you. yes, you’re a princess. yes, you deserve the best. but being unnecessarily bitchy or moody isn’t a good way to impress your sd. that “i’m a crazy bitch” mentality doesn’t do so well in the sugar bowl. sds already have issues at work or at home, the last thing they need is for the girl thats supposed to be his get away creating drama. remember that an arrangement is supposed to be fun for the both of you, while you’re getting that shmoney, he wants to feel good after he has spent time with you. its called “mutually beneficial” for a reason.
11) don’t be afraid to ask, and then ask for more. remember that sds will have no problem asking you, or even telling you, to give them head. so you, should have no problem asking them for money or gifts. i have only slept with men that have already given me an allowance, and you should always do the same, so instead of asking for more money i just ask for what i would spend my money on. i’ve asked for typical sugar gifts, like lingerie, shoes, dresses, but i have also asked for concert tickets, pets, plane tickets (to places where i went alone). every time i ask, i get what i want. your sd should have no issue with buying you whatever your heart desires, within reason. but easier said than done, right? asking for money and gifts can be hard at first, i used to feel bad when i asked. but now, after experience, i just bat my eyelashes and say with confidence “please can i please have _____ daddy! pleeeeease!” and they say yes because it was cute and sweet. say it in a way that they cant say no. if you really want something, get him hard as fuck and horny as hell, then pull his dick out of his pants and right as your mouth is about to touch, pull away. then when he’s begging you to give him head, say “only if you buy me _____” and he’s bound to say yes. i only recommend this for girls who are in a solid arrangement, because this could come off the wrong way to a guy you just met. when it comes to talking about an actual cash allowance (which by the way ladies, is the only type of payment you should accept until you trust your sd enough to wire money into your bank/paypal you) you should always ask what they’re comfortable with first. once you have an idea of what he is looking to give you, make sure you’re not settling for an allowance thats lower than what you need. find out what the average per meet allowance in your area is, then don’t go any lower than that multiplied by the number of times you’ll be seeing your sd. i know in la the average per meet allowance in los angeles is $1k, and in the midwest it is $300. whatever it is, don’t be afraid to bring an allowance up. if the man has money, he won’t mind talking about it in a polite way. lets say you want a $6k/month allowance and he offers you a $4k/month allowance. both of you agree that you want to see each other once a week. mention that your rent/mandatory monthly expense is $x, and that you’ll need more cash to cover that. tell him that you’re not just a sugar baby for the money, that you want to truly experience luxury and that a $6k/month allowance could provide you with that. if he’s truly rich, an extra $2k/month is chump change to him. and also, when you’re not afraid to ask for gifts as well, that can save you a lot of money. my sd dropped $2,300 on lingerie for me, on top of an allowance in one day. if you add up all of the gifts that your sd will buy for you, it can go way over the monthly allowance that you want. i.e., you want a $6k/month allowance, but agree on a $4k/month allowance plus shopping, and he ends up spending an extra $5k/month on your shopping trips. so instead of just getting a $6k/month cash allowance, you got an allowance valued at $9k. that way you don’t have to spend your own money on clothes/shoes/whatever the hell, so you have your cash allowance for necessities and savings.
12) learn how to spot the fakes. personally, i have only ever found sds on seeking arrangement. i think that finding an sd through seeking arrangement is the most straight forward way to go about things. also, you can filter out men by using the advanced search option. i would put filters on so that i only saw men that made $1mil+/yr, and their “lifestyle budget” was set at substantial or high. i would either message them something short and sweet or give them access to my private pics. my little intro was “hey daddy, would you be interested in a teenage princess?” it was definitely a little forward but it piqued the interest of many men, including my current sd river. being that i was looking for the total package (not only willing to give me a nice allowance, but also ridiculously fucking rich, and very nice) i would delete every message that i got from a man with an income lower than $1mil/yr. i would, however, go on dates with men that offered me money just to meet in their first message. did i have any intentions of getting into an arrangement with them? hell no. but was the extra cash for literally eating food nice? hell yes. but there are always men that you should stay away from. this includes:
- men that obviously have no interest in seeing you succeed
- men that drive shitty cars but claim they’re worth millions
- men that try to talk dirty with you over text before you meet
- men that ask for free nudes
- men that ask to fuck for free
- men that say that they “don’t need to pay for sex”
- men that have an issue with giving you money
- men that have ridiculous mood swings
- men that refuse to give you a cash allowance
- men that are full of shit and you can tell that they are lying to you
- men that promise you ridiculous amounts of money before meeting you
- men that refuse to meet at an expensive restaurant/bar
- men with no confidence that constantly need their ego stroked
- literally any man that gives you a bad gut feeling
usually you can tell when someone is genuinely wealthy, but theres always a few sneaky guys that slip by. try to see what car he drives or look at the shoes he is wearing. the wealthiest men that i know don’t compromise on either of those things. also, watch for things that indicate wealth, like veneers, a spray tan, a nice watch, botox, freshly ironed clothes, etc. on top of that, rich men are typically confident people. remember that being successful in business is only 50% smarts, the rest is the connections that you have and can keep up with. that requires a confident person, plus having a fuck ton of money is a confidence booster.
13) don’t give up. i went on 60+ dates before i met my perfect sd in la. i carried on messages on sa with over 550 men. there are plenty of rich men out there, you just need to find them. remember that almost every man wants a hot girl to fuck. remember that almost every rich man cheats on his wife (sadly). you know those beautiful mansions that you see on your dash? someone owns them, and 90% of the time its some old rich guy. those big companies that you see everyday? someone owns those too, and the likelihood of it being an old rich man is through the roof. just know that theres always a man out there that is rich and willing to give you the life you deserve. i always see girls selling themselves short, hanging with men that aren’t in the 1% just because of an allowance. but if you really want luxury, don’t settle for anything less than the richest of the rich. and never decide to give up because you haven’t found the perfect arrangement right off of the bat.
14) remember that sex is a part of sugaring. whether you wait 3 months or 3 hours to sleep with your sd, it will eventually come. i have never heard of/been offered/been involved in a platonic arrangement. i don’t believe that it exists, or if it does i would assume the allowance is much, much, lower than a sexual arrangement. and when it does come time to fuck your sd, you better pop that pussy girl. be prepared for slow thrusts and a lot of moaning and twitching when they cum (from them). sex with an older man is definitely different than sex with guys 18-25, so just know that some weird shit will go down. i depersonalize during sex with sds, even with one night stands i barely feel anything, so for me i have always described sex with an sd as shitty sex. who knows, maybe if i was in love with them it would feel amazing, but all i’ve experienced so far is numbness. maybe that contributes to why i don’t mind sleeping with my sugar daddy, i honestly don’t know. for me, sleeping with a sd didn’t eat me up inside and rot my soul. you know what it did? put money in my hands and louboutins on my feet.
15) be affectionate. if you’re with the right sd, you won’t have an issue with this. hold his hand at the dinner table or in public, look in his eyes and smile, kiss him at random, hug him tightly, scratch his back after sex, scoot closer to him when you sit down together, cuddle with him, lean on his shoulder; the little things you do can make a huge difference. men can tell if youre faking it (for the most part) so try to be very lovey-dovey to let them know that you actually care about them. don’t take it too far, telling them that you’re in love with them when they don’t feel the same way or aren’t in the position to do anything about it can ruin the arrangement. but treating your sd like you’re in love with him will make him want to give you the world. after all, who doesn’t want to be loved?
so far, this is what has gotten me to where i am today. i cannot even imagine my life without sugaring. it has been the biggest blessing in my life, its like the world is at my fingertips. if you think you are ready for the sugar bowl after reading this, go for it. i hope you all take my advice or at least had a good time reading this :)
xoxo,
adriana
